Radiac Calculator No. 1

Now, here's something you don't often have a use for, but when you do you'll save the day! This is the Radiac Calculator No. 1. You can calculate the rate of radioactive contamination over land or sea with this handy, easy-to-use wheel! Let's say Kim Jong-Un finally decides to bomb Austin and your homeowners' association has sent you in as a member of the neighborhood de-con team. With the Radiac Calculator No. 1, you will be able to determine how contaminated each member of your team will be after any given amount of time. The wheel does not, however, help you estimate how many days you can expect to live.

Before you take a look at this wheel, you should know that I have adjusted its preferred setting. If you remove the little metal ring thing from the center pin, the disks come apart. The pink-sided disks are for use on land and the blue are for use at sea. I decided I wanted to see both colors at the same time, so I removed the metal ring. I do not want to re-experience the ordeal I had putting that damn metal ring back on! So I did not return the disks to their proper positions for the photographs below.

The Radiac Calculator No. 1 comes with a nifty vinyl-coated canvas case and a sample problem card for you to practice with. Don't lose that card!